4 ways to make space for creativity when you feel like there is none.

My husband and I have been married for 5 years. As a single woman, my time was completely my own. I wasn’t required to consider anyone else in my daily plans because no one depended on me for essential living. That changed with marriage, I had to learn how to make choices with someone else. Then when our two boys came along, it felt like their lives governed how I lived mine.

I’M A STAY AT HOME MOM WHO HAS HER HANDS IN A FEW DIFFERENT CREATIVE PROJECTS.

I know first hand how hard it is to feel like there is enough time in the day to accomplish everything I want to accomplish.

Being a doting wife, mom of littles, an entrepreneur, and creative with all kinds of wide aspirations can get exhausting rather quickly. I’m not here to tell you that the road to doing what you want to do is going to be easy to get to or even that you just need to do “A, B, and C” then poof you’re done. I will say that I understand the place you're in so allow me to share some things that encourage me when I feel like giving up.

#1. START WHERE YOU ARE

I’m “walk through Ikea and get ideas for my dream office space” years old. I have cried over office chairs, my friend. Not just because they were stunning, because they were, but because my dreams feel so real I could touch them and it hurts not having the resources to make space for them. So I wipe my tears, go back home, grab my laptop and sit on my son's twin sized bed while my little ones play on the floor. I know starting where you are is hard and can feel discouraging, but I want you to understand that;

IF YOU DON’T START HERE - START NOW, THE TIMING OR SETTING MAY NEVER BE PERFECT.

If you can learn early in life to make your “expectations” optional, you will see so many more opportunities to move forward in your purpose.

#2. SHOW UP WHETHER YOU FEEL INSPIRED OR NOT

Starting where you are is hard because you have to constantly choose to work through discomfort. That’s the choice you make when you show up no matter what. I heard a brilliant friend and creative, describe the relationship between diligence and inspiration like two people with contrasting personalities.

DILIGENCE IS THE PUNCTUAL, TYPE A ONE WHO IS ALWAYS WAITING ON INSPIRATION, THE GO WITH THE FLOW FREE SPIRIT, TO SHOW UP.

When we get so caught up in the setting being right, it gives us an excuse not to show up.

If we get accustomed to the discomfort in this process we choose to be diligent in showing up for our craft whether Inspiration decides to waltz in or not. If you’re a writer, are you diligently working to write something daily? If you’re a singer are you singing with proper technique? Let’s move beyond just being talented at things and become deeply skilled individuals. The difference between talent and skill is showing up.

#3. SET SMALL GOALS AND CELEBRATE THEM

Set goals that are enjoyable. Pick little benchmarks along the way to celebrate and decide how you will celebrate before you get there! For instance, as a writer I had the goal of writing every day for a month.

WHEN I SET THAT GOAL I ALSO SET THE CELEBRATION, TO BUY MYSELF MY FAVORITE $7 BOTTLE OF WINE.

We have a hard time celebrating our small victories because we are conditioned to hate the process. Sure, celebrate the finish line, but learn to celebrate the journey too because if you chase the high of the finish line you’re throwing yourself into a life of striving instead of appreciating the growth. 

#4. SEE IT THROUGH

Just finish something. Celebrate along the way, and still finish. If you’re anything like me, when inspiration strikes you can come up with a catalog of ideas and topics to sift through. I know how exciting that can be, but I also know how frustrating it can be to sit in front of those same untapped ideas months or (let’s be real) years later wondering where all the time went and feeling defeated.

RESIST THE URGE TO BE ALL OVER THE PLACE.

Take your plan and goals and be more organized than what is comfortable. It may sound easier said than done, because it is. And that’s okay. Remember that even when you feel there is no space, you still have the choice to start, show up, set goals, and see it through. I challenge you to fight for your creativity on a daily basis.

- Calah